In astrology, Mars represents your passion, drive and will. Mars rules over the sign of Aries, who loves to charge head first into a battle, and Scorpio, who is more of a strategist known for waiting for the right moment to take action. Aries flies through terrain to strike, while Scorpio studies it. Aries fights by telling it like it is, while Scorpio fiercely guards what is precious.
As you may or may not know, I’m an Aries Sun and Venus. I’m used to rushing into things before I really have a good handle on the terrain and making the best of the situation I find myself in. This has worked well for me a lot in my life, but it can also be a drain of resources and energy. My foray into working with clay and creating pottery has brought me the opportunity to start taking a more Scorpio approach to things.
One of the things that I really, really love about clay (and that also frustrates and challenges me!) is how often you need to do things for your future self. If you’re someone who has ever struggled with putting yourself first or being embodied you know how difficult that can be.
I’ve always been into creating ever since I was a little kid. Doodling, escaping into my imagination, photography, painting… all of these things were ways of expressing myself that provided a form of immediate gratification.
Clay is not like that.
At all.
In fact, the more you try to rush the process with clay the more mistakes you’re going to have emerging in your work. Air bubbles from not wedging your reclaim enough. The dreaded S crack from rushing (or skipping) compressing the bottom. Warping during the final firing because you handled your form before it got to leather hard. Much like in our personal lives, there are so many ways to spectacularly fuck up. How many times have you made your heart available to someone when your gut told you not to do so? We’ve all felt mishandled by someone else’s impatient need to be emotionally validated at one point or another.
But that’s also what’s really rewarding about all of it, as challenging and heartbreaking as it may be to your excited inner child. There are so many reasons to be tempted to rush through life. In the artistic and creative practice, but also outside of it. In our relationship to ourselves, each other, and the world we’re inhabiting.
All it takes is one person bringing some chaos into your life to completely fuck you up. This can make it feel nigh impossible to stay in equilibrium with your own ecosystem, to find your center and not have your interiority spinning into a tornado of emotions and expectations. It’s pretty hard to stay grounded when you allow other peoples’ chaos to control your life and inner world. How would Scorpio read and assess the situation in order to protect that inner world?
The Scorpion notices what you’re bringing to the table by reading between the lines. They don’t allow you to push them into a reactionary response before they’re ready because they know all too well that’s how you give people access to your energy. Like a pot handled before it’s leather hard, a heart handled too soon is how it gets misshapen.
And I don’t know about you, but I don’t want my heart to have the capacity for storing other peoples' emotional baggage. But so often we’re taught this is the nature of love. I’m here to tell you it’s not. That baggage is for them to work through, and shouldn’t be dictating how you move through your life.
Carrying other peoples’ tough emotions has been something I struggled with at various points in my life, bubbling over once I hit my 30s. To put it bluntly, over time you find yourself with less and less energy to do this kind of thing at the expense of yourself. That’s just what happens when you keep giving from an empty cup.
The truth of the matter is, you have to learn how to not take other peoples’ bullshit personally. Don’t do it! Choose something you love. Find something that is important to you that you can pour your energy into instead of allowing someone else’s chaos to rule over your mind and heart. Your future self will thank you for taking the time to tend to and protect your heart in a sustainable way today.